Hiiiiiiiiiiii :)

My words always never turn into action :( But yes weight loss is still going to remain as my New Year Resolution so fingers crossed that I'd be able to achieve this goal by March. Two months from now........................ Let's go! Bound to achieve it yar? Okay final say, plan starts from 8th January I shall prove my actions through results by 8th March. JUST WAIT!!!!! REALLY :

I think last year passed by really quickly and there were a lot of changes. As usual, more disappointments than making people proud of me. Made use of the trust they had in me, time and again, letting them down like never before.

In this post I'd like to apologize to my brother-in-law and sister. I don't know how to face them anymore and all I can say is I'm really sorry for all that I've done. Because honestly without the both of you I wouldn't be here today, nor would I be who I am now. Thank you for giving me the final chance, that once chance, to be able to be back with all of you and also know Keeven. It was really the best time and Keeven was really the greatest gift from God. I miss him sooo much and he's like the brightest star in the sky. No others would ever beat this shining star. May your business and things sail smoothly for you this year.

I guess I've learned a lot last year. Be it through the books or experience and honestly, through words I can never express enough gratitude towards my brother-in-law or sister. My life itself, isn't even to repay all the things they've done and sacrificed for me. They are like the ones who found me, gave me hope, taught me, provided me love, shelter, care and warmth.

I thank many others for entering my life and staying. The old has to go for the new to come, yes? So it's time for me to let go of the past but not forget about the memories, values and lessons learnt. It's time to welcome this year whole-heartedly and anticipate what may be in store for me.

There's like so many things on my head, on my mind, I really can't put them in order and list them out. To sum it up it's just the usual family, friends, relationship, studies, goals and ambitions.

I have an ambition and a goal. JieJie I just want you to know like what I've told you before it still remains the same I still hope to have a dessert cafe of my own in the near future :) I know I've let you down but I guess this is just me.

Years down the road when I look at this blog, this post, I hope I remember all the hurt I've inflicted to everyone around me even my closest kin. The day I left, that image etched in my mind. Filled with regrets but I would rather use that energy to pray and believe that it will get better. With or without me, it definitely will :')

So back to what I was saying before......... 2 months to reach my goal... Ahhh :'( Seemingly impossible but I believe with discipline I'd be able to achieve it yar? Mmmmm...... I'd take this bet. 2 months is actually very long so how is it possible to fail!? Something must be wrong if it doesn't work out. Okay, we shall see the results on March!! 'Nuff said. Actually I'm just trying to convince myself : But then no amount of words would be sufficient or persuasive I suppose because results is the best evidence so.... Yupyup.

School starts tomorrow and it reminds me of days back in Secondary school or even, Primary school. That thousand and one reluctance to attend school tomorrow but I still have to face reality. The incessant complaints and wish to own a time machine so I can return to school quickly instead of rotting at home YET when the time comes, I'm already counting down to my next long holidays. The fear and dread to face the start of school once more because of the countless projects each module gives. But all these aside.... Five weeks of hell to tolerate and it'll be over. ALL OVER. Five weeks to rush all my projects AND really put my heart into studying while seeing progress in my dieting... Yes, let's go! :D For the sake of maintaining my results, proving my worth, being back to who I was, getting my old self back. By March, yesyes it's not going to be a dream and I will not allow this dream to drift further away. It shall become reality again. Definitely before my 18th............. Teehee.